07 January, 2010

Hash Trash New Years edition, Directions to Run 825

New Years Run:

The pack was small and took more wrong turns than right ones, including four laps in front of the Egyptian Ambassador's residence, which was not sketchy at all. Border Bitch, Desperate Housewife and HashHound Riley were attacked by a scruffy little terrier that wouldn't take no for an answer, but did finally take DH's shoe for one. Quickie disappeared at one of the holds, only to emerge a few blocks later with a Jerusalem Post under his arm. His defense? He's home alone with no wife and kiddies. Usually men buy things hidden behind the counter when in that situation, but our Quickie prefers wasting his money on the JPost.  The finish of the run was, as usual, into the sea. Everyone got out there, hash brats, hashers, hash hounds…  At the final circle the down down table collapsed, bursting the last San Miguel beer onto the ground. It was very, very sad.

Hare: Captain Caveman

FIW (First in Water): Fluffer

LIW: Twin Peaks

Dog Abuse: Desperate Housewife

Shopping: Quickie

Sock Twins: BB, TP

Team Terry Cloth: DH, Fluffer (his was even monogrammed!), Border Bitch, R2D2, C3P0, Twin Peaks

75 Runs: Desperate Housewife


Saturday Run:

We met out in god only knows where for some seriously shaggy hashing. The trail was filled with muddy embankments, prickly bushes and trees… and that was just to get to somewhere quiet to pee before and after the run! Aside from that, the hashers ran off into the hills, hopefully within the Green Line, trying not to fall down and helping Twin Peaks keep her mind of the gigantic swinging thing between her legs. I mean, it was all she could think about! She couldn't stop touching it and adjusting it… and by it, I mean the Hash Cash. At one point, the pack caught Quickie using his GPS (What the WHAT?!) to figure out where the hell we were. Didn't matter, he was still last.


Hares: CrockSucker, Fart Smella

FRB: Desperate Housewife

DFL: Quickie

Uni-ball: Twin Peaks

Wee, Wee, Wee, All the way home: Desperate Housewife, Border Bitch, Long Horny

GadgetGeek: Quickie

Late Cummers: Twin Peaks, Caveman, Quickie

Returnees: Long Horny, Fart Smella

Misnaming: CrockSucker (and Border Bitch, but she continues to dispute it. If a hasher misnames in the forest…)

New Shoes: Long Horny, who admitted as much during the run and then attempted to backtrack later.

Matchy Matchy:  Twin Peaks, Quickie

Milestones: Quickie, Captain Caveman

Directions to Run 825

The run will start and end at Chez Housewife-Bitch, 16 Levi Eshkol Kohav Hatsafon.  It is one block south of Shay Agnon on Levi Eshkol, near Sde Dov and Seminar HaKibutzim.  For you google map lovers, click here

There will be an On-On afterward - bring things to eat and things to eat with!  Although Desperate Housewife and Border Bitch are as hospitable as ever, they are living out of boxes.  So we will need everything from plastic cups and silverware to meat and salads.

Lost?  Call Fluffer  052-880-1111

Hare Roster - Let me know when you want to set!

16-Jan Goldmember
23-Jan Fart Smella
30-Jan Porn Queen
6-Feb ???????????
13-Feb Quickie
20-Feb AmboHo
27-Feb Semen
6-Mar BlingDong

Hash Scribe

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