HASH WEEKEND RECAP, Directions to Run 818
So, the hash went on a wild two day jaunt to Kibbutz Tzuba. Despite the scribe imagining kibbutz life to be stress-free and filled with happy, smiling people, she found the reality was that it is staffed by a bunch of bipolar kill-joys and it smells like chickens. ANYWAY. We went for a fat hashers dream run- a short jaunt around the kibbutz in the dark, a few hashers fell down a small incline into some prickly bushes and we wrapped everything up with a barbecue where we ate like we'd been raised by wolves. Food was consumed in gluttonous quantities, whole bottles of wine went missing down the throats of thirsty hashers. Too many runs in Tel Aviv left us soft in the face of the chill and we bundled up like we were on Everest in the mountain air. Dinner was finished and the pack retired for a quiet little sing-a-long in BB and DH's room... or 4 hours of 30 people shoved into a room singing top-of-the-lungs karaoke. It. Was. Awesome. The scribe wishes she could remember more than Quickie and Foreplay singing "It's my life" and hotel management banging on the door midway through "Girls Just Wanna Have Fun"… the wet blankets (kibbutznikim) inspired a "quieter" karaoke, where in between each verse, the remaining hashers screamed SHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH and then kept singing.
Fully hung-over and (not) ready to run, the 2nd hash started more or less on time in a nearby park. Just Ryia, PigWoman and PornQueen set a shig-tastic hash with a long straight shot (up a hill) to the finish. The scribe really regretted the red wine lunch she partook in. Some nice gentlemen from the European Commission took our photo but declined to run with us; they said something about being 'serious athletes'. Whatever. There was A LOT of peeing on the hash, sitting on the hash and racing on the hash, all of which are illegal and all of which was punished at the downdowns. Just Ryia became OnOne, but will always be TastyKakes to the hashers with a Philadelphia Connection.
DOWN DOWNS RUN 816
FRB: Fluffer and Pig Woman
DOWN DOWNS RUN 817
Hare: TastyKakes OnOne, PigWoman, PornQueen
FRB: Fluffer
DFL: Twin Peaks and Deliverance
Golden Shower: Desperate Housewife, Wind Breaker, Semen, Deliverance
Stage Fright: Goldmember
Lazy Bastahds, get off your tuchuses!: C3PO, R2D2, Twin Peaks, Floater
Misnaming; Floater
I AM IRONMAN! Windbreaker, Semen
Sissy Hashers in their long pants: Essentially Everyone.
DIRECTIONS TO RUN 818
Hare: Captain Caveman
HASH ROSTER!
5-Dec Floater
12-Dec Pig Woman
19-Dec White Pointers
26-Dec Boston Creamed
2-Jan Croc Sucker
9-Jan Fluffer
16-Jan Goldmember
23-Jan Fart Smella
30-Jan AIDS
13-Feb Quickie
20-Feb AmboHo
27-Feb Semen
6-Mar BlingDong
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