26 September, 2006

HASH TRASH - Run 648

HASH TRASH - Run 648
The Itchy and Scratchy Show!
Hares: Ferfoxsake and Pusher
 
The weather was hot. We circled up and - in keeping with it being a Rosh Hash-ana run - were promised this would be "The Run of the Year"*. It was also characterized as having "Something for Everyone" as well as including one element that would separate the "Eagles" (those following the Way of the True Hasher) from the "Turkeys" (self explanatory). That said, the runners set out for the fields surrounding the EuroPark office complex.
 
The first half was fairly uneventful and conversation revolved mainly around the topic of shopping, specifically hydration accessories**, the most highly recommended being the Fuel Belt (cost- $28-35).
 
At the halfway point, tribute was paid to Dandruff and Pusher, who are going home to Australia, with a round of the first verse and chorus of that country's "best known and much loved national song". Engraved pewter mugs were later bestowed (and Dandruff is demanding a special 147 Hash patch).
 
It was then that we entered the Heart of Darkness. Following the Way of the Hasher, the Eagles - led by the valiant, trumpet-blaring R2D2 and C3PO - forged ahead through thorns, nettles, and reeds. Those trailing behind, (the so-called Eaglets) wished someone had thought to purchase a machete, seeing as they are designed to cut through underbrush, are not terribly expensive ($60-90) and come in very handy when Hashing. They could be used, for example, to quell over-enthusiastic Hares with a light tap to the head.
 
The troubling subject of men suffering bloody nipples has come up again and we cannot fault the sufferers for complaining. Will no one bring the Manzierre from Seinfeldian fiction into reality? After all, if a skort can be real ($48), then why not the Bro?
 
*Unclear whether this referred to Gregorian calendar year 2006 or Jewish year 5766, which just passed.
**Some of us may remember the days when this was called "drinking water out of a bottle".
 
Down-downs
FRB - Captain Caveman
SCB - Dr. Doolittle
Lance Amstrong Award - Dandruff
Virgins - Michael, Michelle
Instant Family Spanish Fly Award - Taco Balls
Returnees - C3PO, Dandruff, R2D2, Taco Balls
Eaglets - Boston Creamed, Michael, Michelle, Twin Peaks
Blooded Hashers - Boston Creamed, Caveman, Diabolo, Ferfoxsake, Michelle, Taco Balls
Big Girl's Blouse - Twin Peaks
 
Directions to Run 649
Place: Ramat Gan near the Diamond Center (and a block away from the British Council)

Meet in the parking lot next to the  
Publicis Ariely advertising agency
7 Achim Bezerano Street

From Ramat Aviv/Herzliya:
Take the Ayalon Hwy SOUTH
Get off at HA-HALACHA exit.
Head towards RAMAT GAN (away from Tel Aviv)
Get onto BIALIK ST.
Take your 2nd RIGHT onto TUBAL ST. (also written TUVAL)
Take your 1st LEFT onto ACHIM BEZERANO (also written BEJERANO)
You will see the PUBLICIS building and parking lot on your RIGHT.
Now slow down and look for street parking.
If you hit Abba Hillel Silver St., you've gone too far.
 
Lost? Call Boston Creamed: 054 215 2653
 
Fabulous Map:
 
IN CLOSING
What more can one say?
 
MUSICAL INTERLUDE
 
FYI... The 4th Annual Azrieli Staircase Race is Coming!
Date: November 3, 2006
Time: 9:30am (arrival between 7-9am, instructions at 9:20am)
Starting point: Parking level minus 4, the Round Tower
Finishing line: 49th floor
Cost - Between NIS 55-100 (competition); NIS 40-70 (general). See website for details.
Online registration: NIS 55 (early bird before Oct. 31) See website: http://www.shvoong.co.il/checkSession.asp or call 1 700 700 305
 
Schedule:
Elite group - 9:30am
Age group 2 - 9:40am
Age group 3 - 9:50am
Age group 4 - 10:00am
All others (group 5) - 10:10am
Closing ceremony - 11:00am
 
Translation of the fine print: The Elite group is open to men who ran previous Staircase Races in under 8:30 minutes and women in under 10:30 minutes, as well as high-level atheletes with proven experience as approved by the organizers.
 
Friends and family members can watch the race on big-screen video
 
AND...
Hear what "Waltzing Matilda" is actually supposed to sound like:
 
-- Boston Creamed


HASH SCRIBE
 


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