Hash Trash Run 899, Directions to Run 900
Last weekend was not about the trail itself, but what awaited at the end of it: BBQ, swimming pool and girls in bikinis (names are irrelevant), all of which courtesy of the embassy of Serbia (and Just Mitch).
The Hash started off with a camp-fire-like storytelling by Semen, enlightening Hashers about their heritage with a book about HHH. After that, it all went to s&#t. Now, your Scribe heard all the Hashers' complaints about the trail led by Black Magic: it seems that Serbians are not familiar with the Hash marking system, nor are they willing to learn it. So as it turned out, the Hare created a crazy and incomprehensible trail, with On 1's, 2's and 3's, T's and Checks coming in from all direction at once. He also apparently decided that Holds are for sissies and marked only Checks for the entire trail (sparking Stiff Meat's creativity: "I thought this is a Serbian Hash, not a Czech Hash"). And as if that wasn't enough, Captain Caveman decided there was room for more confusion, so he started blowing the Hash Horn at times when he wasn't even on the trail. But the final straw was of course, a beer-at-the-half-way promise made by the Hare, that turned out to be a sham. Really - promising the Holy Beer and not delivering? Too far, man, gone too far.
Closing in on the Circle, Hasher/Racist Spit or Swallow took on the challenge of robbing FRB from poor innocent Caveman, which became a fight-to-the-death between Caveman, Fart Smella and SOS. It was a miracle no one was seriously hurt, although sissy-cries were heard by all parties. All was eventually squared at the circle (or after 3 beers, I dunno which came first). And what a circle it was - breaking Hash rules left and right. It started with Bullshit breaking the No Smoking rule in style (he actually brought a couple of cigars, does that count?). Then continued with Virgin misbehaviour with Just Jimmy's chucking of Hash Cups when he was done with them (quote: "Hey, it was empty"), and Just Melissa excusing herself from exposing herself ("My boss doesn't let me show my underwear"?? C'mon, that's no excuse, that's a lawsuit waiting to happen). To top it all off, Fluffer, in a desparate effort to spare some Hash kids the profanities of our songs, came up with a whole new Hash song this Scribe is sure you all will enjoy:
If your girlfriend smells like honey flip her over.
If your girlfriend smells like honey,
(pause) it's a rabbit, not a bunny,
If your girlfriend smells like honey flip her over!"
Priceless.
...and now for this week's run:
posted by Hash Scribe at 1:17 PM
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