19 May, 2011

Hash Trash Run 894, Directions to Run 895

Hello fellow Hashers!

Your Scribe, for one, is quite glad that summer hasn't arrived yet. When I think of runs yet to come, where everyone will glisten as if they were greased with butter and you wouldn't have to pour beer in shoes, cos they'll be dripping sweat instead - I think it's a good thing we're not there yet. But for some, the fact that rain does decide to fall in May is a bummer. Who are those people? Hares who say to themselves "no f#%in' way it'll rain - I'm setting the trail on Friday!" - and then have to set it ALL OVER AGAIN.

Such were the complaints coming from Twin Peaks this week, while stressing that she actually managed to set the new trail on the same exact path. Well, that made Hashers even more confused - since Twin Peaks' idea of a nice Hash is to take Hashers through a roller-coaster ride-like trail. This scribe will roughy estimate more than 2k in elevation changes throughout the Hash.

Hashers huffed and puffed up and down steep streets, trying to find the light at the end of the tunnel. All they really found was a big pile o' s%#t - and I don't mean that figuratively. Our beloved Hare chose (apparently twice) to place the man-made flour-circle inside an even bigger, more impressive canine-made poop-circle. The scent was almost more than we could handle, but we vented through song - "More Beer" became "More Shit".

The stench must have been too much for Crock Sucker, and she joined the walking team. The rest shlepped along for the final cherry: a horrendous uphill to truly deflate whatever was left in anyone's lungs. But wait - there was a prize for the strong-willed, when Stiff Meat pulled out his Brit-brewed box of spicy cheese. Hurray!

After a few accusations and some warm beer, the Hashers went home.

Down-Downs Run 894:
Hare: Twin Peaks
FRB: Deliverance
DFL: AmboHo
Returnees: Stiff Meat, Crock Sucker, Fart Smella
Walking Tall: Just Caitlin
Setting x 3: Twin Peaks
Gillette Cover-Girl: Double Entry
Free Food: Goldmember
Misnaming: Twin Peaks
Mercy Killing: Spit or Swallow
Cripple Crossing: Crock Sucker
Fatty Acids: Capt. Caveman
Bi-Polar: AmboHo
Cheesy Guy: Stiff Meat

...and now for this week's run:

Directions to Run 895:
Meeting time: Saturday May 21st, 16:00, 1600hr, 4pm.
Location: Hash starts at the Ilanot forest.
Directions: From Tel-Aviv:
  1. Take route 4 North.
  2. Pass Ra'anana.
  3. Pass the jail (on your left).
  4. Pass the Bnei Dror traffic lights.
  5. Pass the Hadassim traffic lights.
  6. Get in the left lane, and 300 meters after these lights there is a LEFT turn into the forest (sic).
  7. Look for the Hare.
Bring meats, salads, grill, chairs, ect, for an On-after.
Lost? Call Captain Caveman 052-2445644

Ride requests - help a botha-hasher out:

Other messages:
Stiff Meat has had a change of schedule, and will not be able to set the July 2nd Run (#901). Any Hashers willing to swap - contact Hash Trash ASAP.

Hare roster - are you there?!
#896 May 28 - Boston Creamed
#897 Jun 4 - Goldmember
#898 Jun 11 - Betty Cocker
#899 Jun 18 - Floater
#900 Jun 25 - Fluffer
#901 Jul 2 - Stiff Meat NEEDS A REPLACEMENT
#902 Jul 9 - The Gonadfather
#903 Jul 16 - Quickie
#904 Jul 23 - AmboHo
#905 Jul 30 - Grave Robber

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