17 November, 2008

HASH WEEKEND



HOLYLAND HASH WEEKEND

DECEMBER 5TH TO 7TH 2008

KIBBUTZ ZEELIM

 

DUE TO THE INSTABILTY OF THE GLOBAL ECONOMIC MARKET, THE COMMITEE HAS AGREED THAT THE PRICE FOR THE WEEKEND BE PEGGED AS OF MONDAY 17TH NOVEMBER 2008 TO THE MOST UNSTABLE ECONOMY OF ANY HASH GROUP IN THE WORLD.

 

THUS AFTER CONSULTING LEADING ECONOMIC HASHERS FROM AROUND THE GLOBE AND ATTENDING A MISMANAGEMENT SUMMIT OF THE BEER 20 NATIONS

 

THE COMMITEE HAS SET THE PRICE OF THE WEEKEND AT

$3,096,609.57c ZIMBABWE DOLLARS

 

WHAT DOES YOUR $3,096,609.57c ZWD GET YOU

 

WHERE ELSE IN THE WORLD CAN YOU SPEND $3 MILLION DOLLARS AND DRINK AS MUCH BEER AS YOU WANT.

 

NOT TO MENTION THE WINE, BOTH COLORS ARE AVAILABLE

 

AND YET THERE IS MORE , ALL THE MEAT YOU CAN EAT FRIDAY NIGHT , OUR RESIDENT EXPERT CHEFS, ALL OF WHOM HAVE RECEIVED TRAINING IN TOSSING DEAD COW PARTS OVER BURNING EMBERS FROM WORLD RENOWNED RECOVERING ALCOHOLICS.

 

AND THEN YOU WILL HAVE THE KEYS TO YOUR PRIVATE VILLA FOR TWO NIGHTS, YES TWO NIGHTS. ALL VILLAS ARE FACING RUSSIA SO THAT HASHERS WILL BE ABLE TO CLAIM EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF WORLD FOREIGN POLICY DURING THEIR STAY.

 

SURELY THERE CANNOT BE MORE

 

YES WAIT FOR THIS – TWO YES TWO BREAKFASTS AT A MICHELLIN RATED KIBBUTZ DINING ROOM, SOMETIMES MORE THAN THREE FLAVORS OF YOGURT ARE AVAILABLE.

 

THIS IS TOO GOOD TO BELIEVE, ALL THIS FOR JUST $3 MILLION DOLLARS!

 

ON SATURDAY NIGHT, PREPARE YOURSELVES TO BE WINED AND DINED IN THE FINEST CARPETED ESTABLISHMENT IN THE AREA.

 

THERE WILL BE TWO HASH RUNS SET BY LEGENDS OF THE HASH. WHO IN NORMAL ECONOMIC TIMES WOULD HAVE BEEN DRINKING AT LEADING WORLD ECONOMIC HASH SEMINARS?

 

SURELY IT CANNOT BE POSSIBLE ALL THIS VALUE AND ONLY $3 MILLION PLUS CHANGE.

 

THERE MUST BE A CATCH.

 

 GREAT COMPANY. ALL THE BEER I CAN DRINK, WINE OF BOTH COLORS AVAILABLE IN PLASTIC CUPS, A PLACE TO LAY MY HEAD, ALL THE DEAD COW I CAN EAT AND A SOMEWHERE TO EAT WHERE THERE IS CARPET, THE WORLD FAMOUS KIBBTZ BREAKFAST NOT ONCE BUT TWICE.

 

SIGN ME UP; THIS IS A BARGAIN FOR $3 MILLION.

 

WAIT BEFORE YOU COMMIT LETS GO TO THE TESTIMONIAL PAGES OF PREVIOUS HASH WEEKENDS . . .

 

"THEY THOUGHT THE FRIDAY NIGHT HASH RUN WAS SO CRAPPY AND SHORT THAT THEY RAN IT TWICE" Lager Lout

 

"I GOT SO DRUNK THAT THEY PAINTED MY TOENAILS AND I NEVER KNEW ABOUT IT, THE LIPSTICK ALSO COMLIMENTED MY NEW FOUND FEMINE SIDE" Fer Fox Sake

 

"WHILE I SLEPT IN A HOPS INDUCED COMA, MY FELLOW HASHERS REMOVED ALL 4 WHEELS FROM MY VOLVO AND HID THEM" Captain Caveman

 

" I WENT TO SLEEP IN MY BED , AND DURING THE COURSE OF THE NIGHT THEY MOVED MY BED OUTSIDE WITH ME STILL IN IT AND I WOKE UP OUTSIDE MY ROOM" Trobin

 

"MY MOM STILL DOES NOT LET US DRINK THE BEER" C3PO and R2D2

 

SURELY FOR ONLY $3 MILLION DOLLARS IT IS TOO GOOD TO BELIEVE.

 

THIS OFFER IS AVAILABLE TO ALL HOLYLAND HASHERS TILL WEDNESDAY NIGHT AS THE KIBBUTZ NEEDS NUMBERS FOR THEIR EXCLUSIVE VILLAS.

 

YOU NEED TO EMAIL OR PHONE DR DOLITTLE BY WEDNESDAY NIGHT

scb.avi@gmail.com  0544453106  Please have passport number available.

 

LETS FACE IT, WHEN WAS THE LAST TIME YOU SPENT 3 MILLION DOLLARS ON A WEEKEND AWAY.

 

HURRY HURRY HURRY, EMAIL OR CALL NOW!

 

WAIT . . . SURELY THERE CANNOT BE MORE?

 

YES THERE IS

 

A WALKING BRIDGE TO RIVAL THE GOLDEN GATE, OSTRICH FARMING, A PUB COMPLETE WITH POOL TABLES AND SULPHUR SPRINGS.  Massages are available (with no happy ending) at extra cost.

 

FOR THOSE WHO DO NOT HAVE ACCESS TO A ZIMBABWE DOLLAR ACCOUNT AT THERE LOCAL BANK, HASH CASH WILL RELUCTANTLY ACCEPT ISRAELI SHEKELS IN LIEU

 

TOTAL COST OF WEEKEND HAS BEEN CONVERTED BACK TO 900 SHEKELS PER COUPLE.  195 SHEKELS PER CHILD.  Please note that if you are staying one night or are sharing a room or a single, Dr. DoLittle will advise on an individual basis.

 

Included:

Two Nights Accommodation

Friday Night bbq

All beer and wine

Breakfast Sat & Sunday mornings

Sat Night Dinner at a Restaurant

Two Hash runs, Fri PM and Sat Afternoon

 

On On

TWIN PEAKS

0528743662

maureenkarassik@yahoo.com

 

A DETAILED ITERNARY WILL FOLLOW

 

PLEASE EMAIL OR PHONE BY WEDNESDAY.

 

CHECK OUT THEIR WEBSITE  www.zeelim.co.il

 

 

 


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